Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Facing Fear

For years, I'd said that the only way I'd get in the water in Port Mansfield was if I fell out of the boat.  Love prompts us to do things we don't think we can do.

Gar has been an accomplished traditional saltwater fisherman for many years.  Over the past year, he's developed impressive expertise and success in fly fishing, and convinced me to try his newest fishing passion.

We honored Edgar's birthday with our first trip back to our favorite Texas fishing destination since his death.  And we both had fishing firsts to celebrate - exciting catches and (for me, actually consciously) stepping into the water.

I was physically impacted by the prospect of facing my fear of stingrays, sharks and other unseen creatures.  I couldn't sleep and my digestive system was a wreck.  Gar might not have realized I was serious moments before stepping off the boat, when I asked if I should throw up over the side or in the water.

No stingrays, sharks or other feared creatures appeared.  However, by facing my fear, I joined my son in one of his passions, observed several species of birds up close and personal and got to see smaller crabs than I could have ever observed from the safety of the boat.

And because I'd faced my fear earlier, I was able to plop back into the water to help Gar photograph his huge fish caught on a fly he tied.

I realized that we often ask family members, friends and coworkers to join us in things that are second nature and exciting to us, but intimidating and disconcerting to them.

Things that are easy for us may well cause the angst that I experienced for others.  When we face fears, it's cause for celebration.  And, it's a cautionary note to be attentive to verbal and nonverbal clues that those in our sphere are fearful.

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Size and Sighs of Heart

When we have a big, open heart, we increase our support network.  Supportive networks are always beneficial and help greatly as we deal with loss, disappointment and frustration.  Thus the size of our heart can help us deal with the sighs of our heart.

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Don't Quit!

Gar and I were playing Backgammon on Thursday and it looked like I would certainly win.  In fact, the only way I could lose was to roll double 1s two times in a row, which I did.  When there is a possibility for victory, whether it's winning a game or achieving a goal, don't quit!

Friday, July 25, 2014

Age is only a Reference Point

My precious parents are the youngest/older  (70s and early 80s) people I know. When my grandparents began turning 90, I decided that was my definition of old (who knows - 90 may become the new 70!).  I have friends and colleagues who are chronologically decades younger, but far less receptive to embracing all that life has to offer.  Adults can be x years old or x years young.  My wonderful parents have role modeled x years young for me and so many others.

I think that the next time I'm asked how old I am, I'll ask chronologically or attitudinally.

Thursday, July 24, 2014


All of our potted plants thrive with once per week watering, except one.  And it demands to be watered twice per week, wilting severely, if too many days pass without a drink.  I was convinced, that in my vacation absence, I'd killed this plant.  It was so seriously dehydrated that Gar asked, when he saw the perky plant this morning, if I'd replaced it.

This incredible bounce-back from from a major affliction made me realize once again we can learn so much from nature.  Think about the damage to human relationships that are sometimes caused by minor infractions.  When we realize that my plant's near-death experience was remedied by a bit of TLC, it's easy to see that we'd be well advised to administer and accept TLC frequently in our human relationships.  

Tuesday, July 22, 2014


So many people exaggerate - intentionally or unintentionally.  Many of us are taught from toddler-hood to be polite and respectful.  In following our lifelong teachings, we sometimes overplay just how comparatively good something is to normal, average or everyday.  It's rarer that we are undersold on the attributes of an item or experience.  Though they were afraid they had oversold Crystal Bridges Art Museum, my wonderful parents, despite their best attempts at a fair, but incredibly positive review, had actually undersold this phenomenal venue.  

Though I knew I would love it, I was blown away, because it was far better than I'd imagined.

Exaggeration may be good for egos - ours and others, but underselling (when a sale is made) has the opportunity to create remarkable experiences and memories.