Facing Fear

For years, I'd said that the only way I'd get in the water in Port Mansfield was if I fell out of the boat.  Love prompts us to do things we don't think we can do.

Gar has been an accomplished traditional saltwater fisherman for many years.  Over the past year, he's developed impressive expertise and success in fly fishing, and convinced me to try his newest fishing passion.

We honored Edgar's birthday with our first trip back to our favorite Texas fishing destination since his death.  And we both had fishing firsts to celebrate - exciting catches and (for me, actually consciously) stepping into the water.

I was physically impacted by the prospect of facing my fear of stingrays, sharks and other unseen creatures.  I couldn't sleep and my digestive system was a wreck.  Gar might not have realized I was serious moments before stepping off the boat, when I asked if I should throw up over the side or in the water.

No stingrays, sharks or other feared creatures appeared.  However, by facing my fear, I joined my son in one of his passions, observed several species of birds up close and personal and got to see smaller crabs than I could have ever observed from the safety of the boat.

And because I'd faced my fear earlier, I was able to plop back into the water to help Gar photograph his huge fish caught on a fly he tied.

I realized that we often ask family members, friends and coworkers to join us in things that are second nature and exciting to us, but intimidating and disconcerting to them.

Things that are easy for us may well cause the angst that I experienced for others.  When we face fears, it's cause for celebration.  And, it's a cautionary note to be attentive to verbal and nonverbal clues that those in our sphere are fearful.