It Could Happen to Anyone

Edgar has joined the Way Station ministry at our church, Palmer Memorial Episcopal, serving a hot breakfast to hundreds of hungry Houstonians each Friday.  He always comes home so moved by the experience.  Friday was more emotional than ever, as he greeted a well-educated colleague in the line.  The impact of job loss became far more than a statistic when this former classmate shared his story. 

It makes me realize just how very fortunate I am to have a great job that I love. 

Great Adventure

Gar told me to be casually dressed for a surprise birthday adventure yesterday afternoon.  We had a great time at Trans-Siberian Orchestra's winter concert tour!  It was 2 1/2 hours of non-stop entertainment.  I loved everything about it - his novel idea, the terrific shared experience and another wonderful memory.

Christmas Tree

Our beautiful Christmas tree completed our holiday decorations.  Each ornament has a story.  It's filled with priceless ornaments that Julia and Gar have made through the years.   There are scores of splendid and sentimental ornaments we've received as gifts.  And there are homely ornaments that make us laugh.  It's a fabulous collection that is uniquely ours.  Though a designer wouldn't readily detect a theme for our tree, close examination would reveal that the theme is love.

Double Your Effectiveness at a Networking Event

Networking events provide the chance to meet new people. This won't happen if you spend the event visiting only with those you know.  If you arrive with a friend, separate.  If one of you goes left and the other goes right, you will be able to meet in the middle and connect those you've met.  After the event, take time to compare notes about who you met.

At your next chamber or association meeting consider asking the organizer if you can contact other table hosts and mix your tables for new connections.

Help! My Networking is Not Working!

Here are highlights from my presentation for our Sterling Bank Women’s Business Initiative luncheon in San Antonio this week:

When we find that our networking is not working it’s almost always because we’re not working for our network!  When we work for our network, our network will be effective. We need to create long-term mutually supportive relationships.

We must give before we can expect to get.

We learned the fundamentals of networking in kindergarten:

“Make new friends and keep the old

Some are silver and others are gold.”

Effective networking is a game where everyone wins.  Though our gamesmanship improves from kindergarten through our lives, we learn from each game we play.

Four childhood and one adult game provide networking dos and don’ts:

1. Tag – It’s quick and brief with no meaningful interaction, but at least we’re in the game. Engagement is necessary.
2. Barrel of monkeys – Networking is fun! The links can become sizable, but they are quite fragile.  Bigger is just bigger, not necessarily stronger.
3. Twister - Interconnecting with others reminds us that networking is not an event, but the sum of all of our relationship building activities.
4. Lego – Building a solid foundation allows us to create a mutually supportive network. When we integrate all of the relationships in our lives we netconnect.
5. 21 - My Way (see my 12/2 blog) – Changed rules create unlimited winners.

The common theme of these games is that we increase the number of winners when we don’t keep score.  Before moving from kindergarten analogies, it’s helpful to remember that networking is a long-term process.  It’s like the 5-year old who asks in January how long it is until Christmas. She and we are encouraged to keep believing and be good.

And if we spell NETWORKING as a kindergartner might, we get NETWERKING.  Dissecting this word reveals a fun way to remember the mutuality of networking:

Net We R King (done right, we all win).

There are many ways to maintain, strengthen and grow our relationships including:

• Events
• Face-to-face one on one or small group meetings
• Phone
• Email
• Notes - Send thank you notes, recognition of accomplishments, congratulatory, sympathy
• Recommend books
• Offer time-savers – sending yourself an email with notes from a presentation eliminates the need to transcribe
• Teach someone else what you know
• Recurring appointments in outlook
• Compliment someone in front of others
• Speak
• Write
• Nominate
• Volunteer – active involvement – board development committee
• Recommend
• Ask for advice
• LinkedIn – easy way to follow-up with those you met during the day – Personalize your messages rather than using the standard ones provided.
• Blog
• Share great finds – sales, sites, courses, resources, restaurants, service providers
• When introducing others capture something meaningful about each party

Here’s my big girl expanded version of the friendship poem:

“Make new friends and keep the old

Some are silver and others are gold

Add new people to the fold

But don’t let relationships grow cold

Share the stories to be told

Let your listening be bold

Share advice when you’re polled

But be wary not to scold

We like to buy – not be sold

So put your sales pitch on hold.

Break the networking mold

Netconnect with young and old”

New Game of 21- Everyone Wins

Many adults are familiar with the "21" or Blackjack card game.  I concocted a new version of 21.  As the featured speaker for a Sterling Bank Women's Business Initiative luncheon, for one of my exercises, I provided a deck of cards for each table.  My only instructions were to deal all the cards and see how many winners each table could produce.  As I'd hoped, the players shared cards to ensure that everyone was a winner. One of our 10 tables had to overcome a 21 purist.  And we had over-achiever tables that ensured that they had a 21 hand for everyone present and created 21 for as many additional hands as they could muster.

We all have opportunities to change the rules to create more winners.

Stamp It

I don't know why I this is the first year I've bought Christmas stamps online, but it's my favorite holiday stress buster of the day.  In 2 minutes I was able to get exactly the quantity and selection of stamps I wanted before I'd even showered.  Unless you feel a need to watch antsy strangers in a long line at the post office before finally settling for a mix of stamps currently in stock, do yourself a favor and order online.