Well That's Fantastic!

One of my colleagues shared a hilarious story of his 85-year old mother's recent text.  When his son made a great tackle, the family immediately shared a photo with Nana, who was far away.  Nana's quick text response "WTF" alarmed the family, as they knew that this June Cleaver-like woman had no idea of the contemporary understanding of these three letters. 

He was eager to keep her from sharing this text messaging with anyone else before he could have a conversation to explain what was conveyed, and understand what was intended.  When asked what she meant, she excitedly said, "Well That's Fantastic!".

What we mean and what others interpret are often quite different.  Great communication requires checking for common understanding.

What is a Volunteer?

There are countless descriptive definitions and examples of volunteering.  Volunteers make priceless impact every day.  As I was running this morning, in a volunteer t-shirt, I thought of a simplistic way of depicting what ideal volunteers are:

• Valuable
• Open
• Listening
• Understanding
• Needed
• Talented
• Empathetic
• Energized
• Resource

Thank you to each of you for making such a difference in so very many ways!

Your Organization Is Mine

At a lovely charity luncheon and style show today I met a colleague's guest, and asked about her organization.  She wasn't certain that I'd know of it, but, in an everything's connected way - she works for my law school.  Suddenly, three non-practicing attorneys had the opportunity to collectively appreciate our law school education and the positive impact on our lives.

When we are eager to meet and connect with new people, we often reap unexpected  rewards.  Though I'm extremely grateful for my legal training, I'd not recently had occasion to consciously remember some of the many benefits of this undertaking.  When we take the time to understand our connections, we often realize that your affiliation is mine. 

What's A Lot?

This morning as I was running, a neighbor I don't know, was being walked by his dog.  That's not just the way it looked - his greeting confirmed the optics of the situation.  "Do you run a lot?", he asked.  "Yes",  I answered with a big smile,  "Great day for it!"  He smiled as he and his pet tried to navigate the path and offered, "I don't often walk the dog!"

Even as I answered, yes, (I run almost every day, but not a great distance) I wondered, "What's a lot?" In the case of his intended question and my proffered answer, a lot, meant frequency.  However, it could have just as easily meant distance.

Obviously this was merely friendly neighborly banter.  However, if the subject and response had been important, understanding what is a lot would have mattered.  So much miscommunication occurs due to imprecisely conveying what we mean.  When it matters we need to remember to check for understanding.

What Did You Hear?

This week I heard a disjointed presentation by a keynote luncheon speaker.  I didn't know my seat mates, but by reading a couple of expressions, thought I detected their disappointment at the quality of the presentation.  However, after the event an email string connecting some additional attendees who had exchanged cards, provided an enthusiastic assessment of the presentation by two of the attendees. 

This experience reminded me that what we hear and how we process the information can be vastly different than others who hear the same words.  Regardless of what is actually said, when common understanding is critical, we must take time to assess what others in the group actually heard.

Hot Tea

I'm the only person in my household and birth family who has never enjoyed a cup of coffee. And, I've never liked hot beverages. My morning beverage of choice since college has been a diet soft drink.  I began with Diet Dr. Pepper, migrated to Diet Coke for many, many years and now alternate between the two.  Though my favorite beverages are still ice cold, I've begun to enjoy occasional cups of hot tea in the evening.  It's still a far cry from my family's love of coffee, but I'm finally learning to appreciate their affinity for hot beverages, one cup of tea at a time.

How Many Hours?

I was once again reminded that what we think we are clearly communicating may not be what another is actually hearing.  A Texan and New Yorker were talking about a planned utility company power outage that would impact a local hotel where I was hosting an event for 300.  The Texan heard that the hotel could be without power for 48 hours and immediately shared the news that our event might be in jeopardy.  The New Yorker had actually said that it would be 4 to 8 hours.  I was quickly able to clarify the time frame with the hotel and reassure my colleagues.  Fortunately, the outage was less than the planned maximun of 8 hours, with no impact to my event.

What if the misunderstanding had been about medical treatment?  Health impact could be severe if a patient or care giver heard instructions to seek medical attention if symptoms worsened in 48 hours, but the doctor had actually said to act quickly in 4 to 8 hours.  

When understanding details is important it is a good practice to repeat what we think we have heard. 

Did You Really Hear What I Said?

How often are we guilty of assuming that once we've said something, others heard what we conveyed?  Many misunderstandings are the result of one person speaking and another hearing something totally different than the message which was conveyed.  Distraction, pronunciation, background noise and hearing impairment are common causes of message distortion.  When it's critical that our message is received as intended, we must check for understanding.

What's Cold?

I recently attended a breakfast meeting with a speaker from Boston. The morning temperature in Houston was under 50.  For our speaker, this was a heat wave compared to her temperatures, and she was surprised to see attendees arriving in winter coats.  In the most air-conditioned city in the U.S., with a climate where the average temperature in our coldest month of January is 41, this was cold.  My mind and body can't even comprehend the temperatures endured during the winter in cold climates.

We adapt to our environments.  Though we might assume that temperature is a common denominator, what is cold to a southerner may be balmy to a northerner.  Our different climate assessments provide yet another way to highlight that two people can be exposed to the same scenario and have totally different experiences and reactions.

When common understanding is important, we need to ensure that we develop a consensus view of the scenario.  For the particular issue, we need to define what's cold.

Powerful 3 Letter Words

These 19 three-letter words represent powerful ways of understanding, acknowledging, doing and being.

How?
Why?
Ask
See
Yes!
Awe
WOW
AHA
Can
Aid
Try
Aim
Win
Add
Now
Act
Buy
Fun
Hug