Why Didn't You Respond?

It's hard not to take it personally, when we don't get the hoped for reaction from others.  There may be multiple terrific reasons that aren't even remotely related to us, including:

• Talking on the phone with a hands-free device that isn't obvious
• Didn't see us
• Didn't hear us
• Totally absorbed in something
• Forgot
• Didn't actually receive the message
• Language or customs difference

When we feel confident, it's easier to accept that we may simply need to try again to reach our intended party. 

Flimsy Excuses

I'm so glad I didn't let a little sprinkle deter me from my morning run.  My health and mileage goals, coupled with the fact that running makes me feel good, provide adequate motivation for me to hit the neighborhood streets most mornings.  However, with a rainy weekend in the weather forecast, I was tempted to use the dampness as an excuse not to run.  Saturday mornings generally allow for the most sightings of our fitness conscious and dog-walking neighbors.  However, this morning only a few of those motivated by their canine companions were out and about.  

I've long known that I can learn from everyone I meet and from my feline friends.  This morning's tip from determined doggies set a great example of not allowing flimsy excuses to prevent us from working toward our goals.

It's Too...

Though Houston is blessed with mild winters, the rapid change in temperature from the 80s to the 40s makes early mornings seem especially cold.  It would have been easy to opt out of running this week, but I didn't.  Each sequential cold day, I made additional appropriate clothing adjustments to make the experience more positive.

Change of any sort always gives us an excuse to suspend our positive activities.  Instead of deciding that it is too (insert any obstacle) to achieve our objectives, it often helps to overcome the excuses by focusing on the positive outcome/feeling/accomplishment achieved by powering through any initial discomfort.

The Dog Ate My Homework

Board members for one board I'm on receive weekly updates from the top executive of the organization.  Recently, we received a note from another staff member that the communication would be delayed because the executive had been bitten by a dog.    My first instinct was to assume that it was a bit of humor to explain the delay.  Another board member had the same reaction.  Unfortunately, he really did get a nasty bite. 

The communication made me realize that when we are in the position of explaining an unexpected situation or apologizing, we must ensure that our words are received as intended.   Otherwise our words may be about as believable as telling the teacher that the dog ate my homework.

Reality of Excuses

There are so many excuses, including:

• I'm too______
• I'm not ______ enough
• _____ is better at that
• My participation won't matter

The reality may be:

• I have other plans
• I don't want to
• I don't think that I can
• I want to be convinced

When others don't have time or interest, accepting their excuse is the best option.  However, many other excuses leave the door open for further discussion.  Opening that door can be as simple as asking, "Is there anything that I could say or do to change your mind?".

Painted into a Corner

The visual image of an individual painting himself or herself into a corner is vivid and instructive.  Intellectually we know that we need to plan ahead, but realistically life happens.  Lack of planning is the primary reason that we paint ourselves into a corner.  But we also risk this reality when we make excuses, deny our lack of experience or consistently exhibit a negative attitude.