We See the Same Thing Differently

One of my young colleagues and I were visiting at a retirement celebration for another co-worker yesterday.  He has been an engaged participant in our Comerica Bank Master of Diversity Awareness program classes that I've taught.  He made a point, beautifully and simply, as we were sharing perspectives about the initiative.  He held his raised hand between us at eye level.  Though we were both viewing his hand, his view of his palm was far different than my view of the back of his hand.  What a lovely reminder that we all see the same things differently!

Details Matter

Great marketers are skilled at getting us to remember what they emphasize.  Edgar and I had a lovely meal at a neighborhood restaurant this week.  They also have other locations, and were celebrating their 20th anniversary by distributing $ off coupons for the next visit.  Edgar remembered the 20 and thought that our coupon was $20 off of our next meal.  However, I remembered that they were celebrating their 20th anniversary with $10 off of our next meal.  Wish he'd been right!

This reinforced one of the gender communication differences from the session I facilitated earlier in the week. Though each individual is distinct, there are a number of females who are better at recalling details than male counterparts.

Though the details in this case did not matter, there are frequent interactions where details do make a big difference. When that's the case, it's important to communicate more than once or have more than one person study the details.

Iceberg Diversity

What we see in others is influenced by what we expect to see and what they reveal.  However, we miss so many elements of who others actually are unless we delve deeper than the persona initially revealed to all encountered.

A small percentage of who we actually are is readily revealed to all those we meet.  Thus, like an iceberg, our true depth, breadth and potential impact is hidden.

Diversity Dimensions

I became intrigued by Comerica’s Master of Diversity Awareness program as soon as I discovered it, but fully realized its potential when everyone in the Business Bank was asked to engage.  It is encouraging that nine elements of diversity are included in the curriculum, the widely expected areas: age, gender, sexual orientation and culture/ethnicity plus other oft included topics: religion and disability but broadened to also encompass: work/life balance, thinking/personality styles and leveraging diversity for performance enhancement. 

The curriculum is ever expanding and positively evolving with opportunities for all colleagues to recommend options for inclusion.  This ensures that the program will remain fresh and relevant and interestingly, creates the possibility that no two colleagues will experience the same content as different levels of completion are recognized – bronze, silver, gold and platinum. 

In addition to the corporate expectation of program participation, I knew there was an opportunity for continuous learning, which I’ve always embraced, plus the chance to be a role model and advocate for our Houston Comerica colleagues.  There have already been chances to educate colleagues about the importance of including broad experiences, perspectives and points of view.  And I’ve been able to share the variety of elements available, including Academy Award nominated films that provide entertainment value to share with family or friends.

My official diversity training began early in my career and initially focused only on ethnic/cultural differences.  Though the first class was likely over 25 years ago, I vividly remember learning from an African American colleague that diversity is not about color blindness.  Rather it is about actively recognizing, acknowledging and accepting differences.

Thankfully, a gay friend told me early in my career, how difficult it is to fit into a predominantly straight workplace.  Photos of their partners weren’t expected to be displayed in the office, invitations were often extended only to spouses and with so little information available with early cases of AIDS, unfounded fears of exposure existed.   I became sensitive and supportive of these challenges and universally began extending invitations to spouses or significant others.

Though various tools (Myers Briggs, Birkman, DISC, Social Styles Selling Skills) to understand and enhance individual and team performance weren’t then categorized as diversity initiatives, it is clear to me now, that these were critical early efforts to recognize diversity’s ultimate promise.  By best understanding ourselves and others, we have the chance to utilize the skills, strengths, preferred ways of working and new ways of approaching projects to improve individual, team and company performance. 

Years ago, I realized that diversity is like a multi-faceted diamond.  It is far broader than even the nine elements included in our MDA program.  Our family composition and dynamics, education, where we were raised, skills, abilities, experiences, physical traits, emotional well-being, attitudes and outlooks all influence how we present ourselves, interact with others and perform the roles we play.

Some discoveries from the different program elements and suggestions include:

• Micro-inequities can play a huge part in discouraging, disengaging or losing valuable perspectives.  Thus exercising the Platinum Rule has huge importance.  The Platinum Rule indicates that we should treat others as they expect to be treated.  This has far greater potential than the more broadly advocated Golden Rule.
• Gender issues must be taken seriously by men as well as women.  Unless we are all committed to using the entire workforce, we will fail to realize the gains available when females are more broadly represented in board and leadership positions.  New books like Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In and Bonnie St. John’s How Great Women Lead expand the dialogue and raise awareness of the opportunities that exist.
• Religious speech in the workplace is allowed, even if controversial, just as other nonreligious speech is allowed.  Speculation of negative feelings or impact is not sufficient to thwart religious expression.
• “Overqualified” is a seemingly politically correct way to address a prospective employer’s concerns that an older worker might be less committed to a job.  Until we understand a person’s true interest in a job, we risk unintentionally failing to hire the best, most experienced candidate.
• “Looksism” is another diversity element not included in traditional diversity programs.  It is easy to discriminate against another because of appearance with or without consciously acknowledging these biases.

The MDA program has great potential to broaden our expectations of gains to be realized when we choose to be truly inclusive of the differences that make each of us unique and special individuals.   As more colleagues tackle the curriculum, we have the chance to overcome biases, increase respectfulness and improve performance.   And we add another common language for achievement - bronze, silver, gold and platinum. 

Micro-Inequities

A Comerica Bank computer based training course, that is an option for achieving various levels in our Diversity Awareness program, effectively addresses micro-inequities.  These are small gestures, actions, comments and lack of acknowledgement that can disengage team members.  It's not always the big affronts that cause the biggest damage. Eye rolls, arriving late, leaving early, crediting a friend/insider (rather than the first to propose) with a great idea, exclusive pre-meetings and post-meetings, side conversations, checking electronic devices and failure to listen are a few ways that valuable inputs are thwarted and valued colleagues   may choose to seek other employers who value their perspectives.

Every day we have multiple opportunities, big and small, to gain insight from those whom we encounter.  It doesn't take a lot to make someone feel special, nor does it take much to make someone feel insignificant.  Special wins every time!

Diversity is Differently Abled

Though we often think of the term "differently abled" to address those with special needs, it is a term we all need to embrace to recognize, engage and utilize the different skills, abilities, experiences, insights and perspectives each of us have to offer.  So often we seek and find commonality, yet innovations, breakthroughs and ideal engagements are generally the result of incorporating different ways of thinking, seeing and acting.

Different Shades of Human

Yesterday, I heard a great description to encompass all aspects of diversity:  we are all different shades of human.  In forming relationships, we seek to identify and appreciate similarities and differences.  Only when we recognize our fundamental sameness, that we are all human, can we begin to explore, understand, accept, embrace and learn from our differences.

Uniquely Me!

We are all inundated with messages about things we could, should and must do.  After adhering to our core beliefs, we need to give ourselves permission to be uniquely us.  Only by being our authentic selves do we provide our best personal and unique perspectives, talents and skills to any project we embrace.

Diversity is a Multi-Faceted Diamond

We often think immediately of race, ethnicity and gender diversity. Years ago, I had the opportunity to participate in an eye-opening exercise. A group of us were instructed to move across a courtyard as a statement was read if the statement was true for us. We were told to look at those who were standing with us and those who were not. The questions involved everything from our own and our family's educational levels, to the ability to access a sum of money within 24 hours, to childhood experiences and many more. This provided a very vivid way of demonstrating to me that diversity is truly like a multi-faceted diamond. Just as each diamond facet reveals a new brilliance, each answered question reveals an individual uniqueness or element of diversity from which we can learn.