Who Do You Know?

A dear friend recently asked if I knew anyone at an organization with a job opening that looked interesting to her.  I do know current employees at the organization, including the person to whom she would report. However, I chose to connect her with another special friend who recently left the organization.  A short and meaningful conversation quickly led to the assessment that this job would not be a good fit.  Had she visited with the hiring manager, she might have ultimately come to the same conclusion.  Or she might have made a career move that would have been disappointing and unfulfilling. 

We need to consider what we are seeking when we ask for connections.  I knew that she needed to determine if this was a possibility that she should pursue.  Someone else might have provided exactly what she asked, a connection to the organization.

Biting Your Tongue or Biding Your Time

I asked a friend who is in transition if she was "biting her tongue" during transition discussions.  What she heard was "biding her time".  I'm glad we clarified the misunderstanding.  The basis of my question was that she has a lot of experience with mergers and much wisdom to share.  The question she thought I'd asked would imply that she was a lame duck with little to add to the process. 

When we hear something unexpected, clarifying the message, can prevent unfortunate misunderstandings.

How Many Hours?

I was once again reminded that what we think we are clearly communicating may not be what another is actually hearing.  A Texan and New Yorker were talking about a planned utility company power outage that would impact a local hotel where I was hosting an event for 300.  The Texan heard that the hotel could be without power for 48 hours and immediately shared the news that our event might be in jeopardy.  The New Yorker had actually said that it would be 4 to 8 hours.  I was quickly able to clarify the time frame with the hotel and reassure my colleagues.  Fortunately, the outage was less than the planned maximun of 8 hours, with no impact to my event.

What if the misunderstanding had been about medical treatment?  Health impact could be severe if a patient or care giver heard instructions to seek medical attention if symptoms worsened in 48 hours, but the doctor had actually said to act quickly in 4 to 8 hours.  

When understanding details is important it is a good practice to repeat what we think we have heard. 

Different Ways of Seeing

I still vividly remember my precious Mother's angst as we drove home from the optometrist so very many years ago. With my new glasses, I kept commenting on the individual leaves on the trees, mortar between the bricks and other details that lucky 20/20 vision individuals routinely experience.  Distant views of these things had been obscured with my serious near-sightedness.  I had no basis for comparison, so my newfound clarity was awesome. 

Mine is a dramatic example of illumination, but hopefully a reminder that we all see things differently.  Only by comparing visions do we have the benefit of different ways of seeing a situation.