Looking Forward

When grief takes center stage in life, it is hard to think beyond the moment.  However, it is healing and healthy to find future oriented things to anticipate.  So often, when asked what another can do for us, we don't have an answer.  One of the loveliest things that our extended family did, to alleviate the anxiety of our first altered Thanksgiving, was to create a totally different venue.

It is helpful to have others engage us in interesting experiences beyond the walls of our "one day at a time" existence.

Measure and Modify Goals

Goals provide a measurable way to track progress toward something important.  Setting goals is a critical first step, followed by consistent steps for achievement.  Despite our best plans for execution, life sometimes gets in the way.  That's when we need to adjust our plan - not abandon it.

My health goal for the year was running 400 miles.  As I saw that I was going to exceed this, I set a new stretch goal of 500 miles, and was making good progress for achievement.  Then life through me a huge curve ball.  When I was unable to run during the month of October, I could have scrapped the 500 mile goal and decided that 400 was good enough for 2013.  Instead, I decided to modify my plan and still strive for what had now become a true stretch goal.  Thus, a little mist and 42 degrees didn't keep me from running this morning, nor did morning and early afternoon appointments yesterday.  I made clothing modifications this morning and timing ones yesterday.  If I'd not decided to stick with my mileage goal, I'd have easily rationalized two missed day of physical activity.

Goals keep us moving - sometimes literally.

Be Kind to Yourself

Many of us are quite accomplished at showing great kindness and compassion to others.  We're not always as apt to respond to our own needs.  The Bible, in Mark 12:31, tells us "Love your neighbor as yourself." The challenge is two-fold:  we must be lovable and loving.

Gratitude and Grief

Losing a loved one is incredibly difficult.  The journey is made better by the countless acts of love, kindness and caring of family and friends.  Opening our hearts and minds to receive comfort allows us to focus on the many things we have for which to be grateful, rather than dwelling exclusively on what we've lost.