No More Big "Buts"

We limit ourselves each time we use the word "but".  I'd like to _______, but I only know how to________.  If we banish this enormous little word and substitute the word "and", we move ourselves immediately to considering possibilities of how to achieve our goals, dreams and desires.

Big Dose of Sunshine

One of my colleagues was in an even better mood today than normal.  She attributed her ebullience to the beautiful day and  daylight savings time produced sunlight in the early evening, I joked that she had a sunshine I.V.  We all need to assess the people, places, things, experiences or memories that easily boost our spirits, like my friend's big dose of sunshine, and find ways to frequently harness that natural boost.

Positive Four Letter Words

It's fun to think of the many positive four letter words that encourage, inspire and motivate us:

• love
• home
• hope
• will
• give
• help
• live
• care
• free
• play
• most
• dear
• idea
• your
• plus
• wows
• best
• soul
• hold
• joys
• epic
• good
• well
• pray
• keep
• baby
• give
• zest
• join
• pure
• glad
• kudo
• true
• hero
• best
• luck
• mate
• fine
• tact
• wish
• pact
• yeah
• wish
• edgy
• kind
• life
• gems
• have
• know
• look
• edge

What four letter words encourage, inspire or motivate you?

Key to Listening

Yesterday afternoon, I answered the phone to a most welcome call in the midst of crazy busy activities, schedules and opportunities.  A very successful business woman greeted me with many messages that were music to my ears:

• As a follower of my blog, she had used one of my entries successfully for one of her team meetings
• She reminded me who had introduced us many years ago
• She connected many of our shared wonderful colleagues
• She viewed me as someone she'd like as a mentor

She shared a memorable message about listening that her mother had shared with her as a young child - the letters in "listen" and "silent" are the same.  Sometimes a call from the blue is what we need to remind us that we can only truly hear when we eliminate the extraneous noise. 

Great Speaker

I had a unique interaction with an attendee at our June Sterling Bank Women's Business Initiative Luncheon in San Antonio.  A lovely woman and I had a great "getting acquainted visit". This woman had not previously attended our events.  She mentioned that her friend had told her that she'd heard the speaker, and she was great. 

I am rarely speechless, but for several seconds, I weighed the possibilities of her friend's endorsement.  Though a million thoughts entered my mind, I politely told her that I was the speaker. 

This experience reminded me that people arrive for events with varying degrees of interest, engagement, understanding and motivation.

Motivation is Individual

I wish that I could motivate others to undertake beneficial tasks, projects and careers.  It's taken me half my life to realize that I can only motivate myself to do the things that I want and need to do.  For all others I can provide encouragement, create a ripe environment, contribute resources, nudge progress and give feedback.  Just as we cannot lead a horse to water, we cannot instill in another our definition of achievement or our model of striving toward success.

Zipping to Success

"Meet you at the other end of the zip line!" I spoke these words in the group to motivate myself to successfully tackle the high ropes course. And it worked! I'd made a public commitment to complete the task ahead. It's important to me to do what I say I will do. Though I didn't know precisely what was ahead, the goal was clear: complete the ropes course and zip to success across the stream.

The confidence in my words masked the nervousness that I felt, and many others voiced. It changed the group dynamics. The comments of other first-timers prior to my turn to share my thoughts before we began had mostly expressed fear, uncertainty and tentative commitments to try.

Not only did I conquer the ropes course. Another benefit of my declaration of expected success was the impact on a macho colleague. It motivated him to overcome
his fear of heights and also zip to success.

There's more at risk when we publicly declare our intentions, but there's also increased probability of success. We're suddenly accountable to others. When we silently commit to try to achieve a goal and obstacles arise, we can make excuses and quietly accept failure. The stakes rise when we've shared the goal with others. We want to succeed for ourselves and to honor the commitment we've made to them. And, if it spurs a little healthy competition more winners will emerge.

Meet you at the other end of the zip line!