Everything is Personal

One of the least astute cliches someone can use, when delivering bad news is "Don't take it personally".  This ineffective catch-phrase, is at best, a time-filler, in an uncomfortable conversation to let the hearer know that she/he was not selected for a job, promotion, continued employment or other important roles.  

The way that we perceive each moment, day, week, month, year, decade and lifetime is uniquely personal.  And, thankfully our perceptions are as unique as we are.  Since everything is personal, we have an opportunity to selectively share with appropriate audiences of, 1 to millions, our ideas to improve the world our way.

Intentional v. Unintentional

Things don't always happen as we'd hope.  Often it is unintentional neglect, oversight or ignorance of the situation that causes angst or hurt feelings.  When appropriately addressed, we can forgive and move on.  However, many damaged relationships occur because we think (or know) that the slights were intentional. 

Regardless of our assessment of how intentional or unintentional the action or inaction may be, we owe it to ourselves to assess the importance of the real or perceived unmet expectation. 

Valued relationships deserve fair assessments, the benefit of the doubt and second chances.

We all make many unintentional, and often unconscious, mistakes. 

Often, we need to accept heartfelt apologies intentionally and excuse unintentional slights as anomalies.

Gift of Time

Sometimes time together is the best gift we can give and receive.

In our interactions with those we cherish, how we perceive things may or may not align with their perceptions. What joy when we view the experiences similarly!

Yesterday a friend shared a story that illustrates this beautifully. One day Charles took his son Brooks fishing. He wrote in his journal of that day, "Went fishing with my son; a day wasted." His son also wrote of that exact same day in his journal. Only his entry read like this, "Went fishing with my father; the most glorious day of my life."

Make Me Look Good

A friend and I attended a business function last evening.  When the photographer asked to take our photo, my friend asked specifically that the photographer make her look smaller.  This astute photographer was eager to deliver great customer service and took 3 photographs staged differently to ensure that my friend was pleased. 

Not only do I love stories of great service, this story highlighted a universal need.  We all want to be positively perceived in our endeavors.  When we look for opportunities to make others look good, we all win.

Old

My precious mother-in-law (deceased) used to refer to herself as "the oldest woman alive".  This was not an indication of any age-related disability, but rather a distinction she claimed because of her multi-generational friends.

As children, we all have different perceptions of what's old.  During elementary school, it might well be any child who's in a grade ahead of ours.  By the time we graduate from high school to enter the adult world of college, our perceptions change.  We realize that college graduates are a step ahead.

When I entered the post-college workforce, very few other fresh college grads were dispersed into a seasoned workforce at AT&T in Houston.  This was my first confirmation that skills and abilities trump tenure and age.

Age soon became irrelevant in the workplace.  Skills, talents and successes crossed age boundaries.

Only when my cherished elders each celebrated their 90th birthdays did I acknowledge that age was more than a state-of-mind, but also a state-of-body.  Though many would peg a much earlier age for old - 90 is my threshold. This is because I have been blessed to share many treasured experiences with many incredible octogenarians.

Like my precious mother-in-law, I enjoy multi-generational friends.