What Were You Thinking?

Every communication is impacted by the tone, setting, intent, context and timing.  I've thought a lot recently about the question, "What were you thinking?" 

When we ask a young child, as we pick them up from school, we might inquire about their impression of a new concept or subject matter.  It is an inquiring question with no judgment attached.  We sincerely want to know what they think about something they've not previously encountered.  The question is asked to seek their honest input. 

It is also a stupid question that I often pose to unhearing drivers of other vehicles who cut me off, drive slower than molasses, decide that all of the miles of notices that the lane is ending don't apply to them, or drive distractedly.

It's the question asked when a beloved child forgets his/her ingrained values.

And, just as when our children are young, it's also the inquisitive way of ascertaining what our colleagues are thinking when they propose a new offering.

So often, we assign limiting parameters to enlightening questions.  I hope that I will most often pose the question with the anticipation of gleaning information that is new to me, rather than judgmentally inquiring.